i like to lift heavy things and have no idea what is going on with my life.

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Did box jumps today for the first time. My shins are ripped up. Every time I’d slip and scrape them I’d just jump again. Go hard and don’t back down. Bruises and blood will heal. No time for being a little bitch when I’m at the gym. I’m there to train.

lifting makes me so happy. brings so much peace to my life despite the loud rap music and clanking weights. for those two hours I am myself every morning. completely lost in it. no worry about money or school or whatever else is stressing me. just lifting heavy shit and focusing on that. favorite part of my day by far.

People are like stain-glass windows, they sparkle and shine when the sun is out but when darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within
- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (via zeeksfitfreaks)
Everyday they start to show a tiny bit more. I’m really self-conscious about them (my hiding abs) and they aren’t my priority, but I’m learning to love where I’m at. Warning…I may start babbling on now! I’ve been working so hard lately at having a positive relationship with food and working on really listening to my body. So some days that means adding more cardio and some days that means eating chocolate. I don’t weigh my food out right now like I have for almost the past year. Putting the food scale away for now was so difficult. It may sound silly, but to go from eating disorders to recovery and then using a scale shortly after, I became really attached to it. The meal times and exact portions and cardio schedule is gone right now and it scares the shit out of me. I want so bad to just amp my cardio and eat less to get lean like my old coach did with me, but I will not. That trapped me and made life awful. I’m happy right now. I’m hitting all sorts of PRs lifting and am starting to feel the passion again. I don’t let lifting and fitness define me and take over my life anymore. I have so much going on with school (accepted into my program this spring!), friends, volunteering, family, my jobs, and so much more. They’re all so so important to me now. I love to lift and always will. My potential motivates me. I’ll step on that stage when the time is right. Maybe this fall, maybe in three years. There is no rush anymore. I’m happy right now and am so so blessed.
Q: did you ever end up eating any fudge or rice krispies?

no ma’am! willpower was so strong for once. I ended up having a questbar instead. trying to lean down a bit for summer and if I compete this fall.

asked by beccaeb

gluten free rice krispies and fucking carrot cake fudge at work. this is killing me.

Hi! This is me unfiltered and where I’m at. Struggling a lot with body image lately. Hoodies have become my best friend. It frustrates me to not be able to love myself for who I am. Someday it will happen.


Goddamn some of yall don’t think you’re sexy, and I just want to let you know that you’re all sexy as motherfucking fuck. Badass motherfuckers. Okay.

Q: I think that yes the anon was rude but you have a problem that many of us have. They said your butt is flat but they complimented your quads. Stop honing in on the negative and focus on the positive. Like people tells me my chest is flat and it's whatever cause I do have small boobs is comparison to the average girl, it's a fact. I get compliments all the time on my arms and abs and that's what I focus. There's always going to be someone with bigger boobs or a stronger booty game. ITS OKAY.

I never said I had a problem with them liking other booties, just hating on mine. I’m perfectly fine if they don’t like mine. I like mine so that’s all that matters. There’s always going to be someone with features that someone else will prefer and that’s okay. It’s normal.

I was simply stating that I didn’t want their hate on here even if it was followed by a compliment. That’s like me saying your hair is really ugly, but you have stunning eyes and just focusing on the eye comment because it’s positive. Things don’t work that way. Basically only positive should be spoken. The rest is just hurtful.

Hopefully this didn’t come off the wrong way to you or feel like I’m attacking you, anon. I appreciate you sharing your perspective.

asked by Anonymous
Q: You're gorgeous! Never forget that <3

Thank you so much!

asked by now-and-forever--more
looked in the mirror tonight and damnnnn. so attractive. no fucks were given today and I just enjoyed eating off plan and had no makeup and sweats and saw my parents and we&#8217;re getting along so well right now and I have a giant food baby and I&#8217;m housesitting this week and that kind of scares me and so does not weighing out my food anymore and thanks okay because change is really good and I&#8217;m trying to be happy.



fun fact: you don’t cure depression by telling me i have nothing to be sad about

another fun fact: you dont cure anxiety by just getting up and doing whatever it is that makes you anxious

(Source: merankoria)

If you don’t get excited when you’re about to kiss someone then you probably shouldn’t be kissing them. It should get you riled up inside and should not be mediocre.
- Crazy Sexy Khool (via crazysexykhool)
Q: Whatever happened to the whole "if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all"? People are so rude on tumblr and the internet as a whole. I have always gone by the - if you can't make a positive impact - shut the hell up. Btw, you look awesome, and anons can suck a cervix.

I agree completely! People should lift others up and not bash on their progress.

Also thanks for the love. I’m humbled by the support from you all.

asked by Anonymous
Q: Your booty is just fine :)

And so are you! Thanks for the love!

asked by Anonymous